aging

TRAJECTORY

 

Live long enough

Might find you’re in

A personal déjà vu

Full circle

Repeating events

People, places

A bit different

But it’s like

This is it

Get it right

This time

Some call it

Instant Karma

But here we are

Older

And like reprising a role

Done when young

The script remains the same

Can we make alterations?

Will we?

Sitting and staring

Like my little girl self

Children are prisoners

So are the aging

But I’m desiring the other side

Would wander in sandy boots

Climb tree canopies

Lift my wings

Through the clouded gateway

Barely brushing the leaves

But hey, deep down I know

Nothing will change

Nowhere to go

It’s me

Still me

And all the years of playing adult

Doing, dreaming

Tangential meanderings

Circumferencing

The full circle

360 degrees

Add that up

(Oh, yeah, it’s all numerology to me)

Equals 9

Tarot Hermit

Seeking the truth

For once, though

I do not mind

The vision of

Swinging a lantern

Through darkness of indecision

It is finally a relief

To be

Alone…

 

© 2017 Clarissa Simmens (ViataMaja)

IMAGE: fenced in

FREE1

 

METABOLICALLY ALIVE

 

It’s like my body moved

Into a new neighborhood

Life has changed so much

Old friends gone

Family far away

New puppies

New situations

Only the birds look familiar

Moved so much these many decades

Should be used to starting over

Must remind myself

I’m a warrior

Living in the 8th continent

Senescent Land

Pangaea-less

No exploration ship

No way to cross back into

Familiar territory

Unlike Campbell’s Hero

The threshold crossing is blocked

Nothing left to do

But smile at the thought

Of a new adventure…

 

© 2017 Clarissa Simmens (ViataMaja)

IMAGE: Marco Polo Exploration Ship

 

ABANDONED HOUSE (sonnet)

*scroll down for a YouTube video*

 

Doesn’t take a therapist to know why

I bond with exhausted, forsaken shacks

Nothing but the crows circling with a cry

Prowling, feral cats alert for live snacks.

 

Why empty so long? How did this house fail?

Dirty pink insulation leaking out

Of screaming mouths with crying walls so frail

Mold and dirt and shaky steps, cause for doubt.

 

What happened here in the maddened attic?

Ancient clothes and books hug the swollen floors

Tell me your secret, you ache brick by brick

Relinquish the mystery of closed doors.

 

No one deserves abandonment, ever

Helping lost and wrecked, lifetime’s endeavor.

 

© 2014 Clarissa Simmens (ViataMaja) from Poetic Alchemy:Talking Blues

(tweaking an old poem)

**YouTube video Ella Mai, Left Me https://youtu.be/yOVNS12CVqE

IMAGE: Abandoned House (public domain)

 

 

 

 

 

 

FADING OUT

 

*scroll down for a YouTube video*

 

Earth pirouettes me past the sun

Innumerable orbits, yet the ballet’s not done

Seems merely an hour dancing on toes

Orchestra adagio-ing as my body flows

Time a frail leaf the winds once blew

Grim Reaper leads me in a pas de deux

 

© 2017 Clarissa Simmens (ViataMaja)

IMAGE: Darcey Bussell & Zoltan Solymosi in Black Swan pas de deux

 

https://youtu.be/VtEQ-BnNNl8 YouTube Swan Lake pas de deux

FADING OUT

*scroll down for a YouTube video*

Earth pirouettes me past the sun

Innumerable orbits, yet the ballet’s not done

Seems merely an hour dancing on toes

Orchestra adagio-ing as my body flows

Time a frail leaf the winds once blew

Grim Reaper leads me in a pas de deux

© 2017 Clarissa Simmens (ViataMaja)

IMAGE: Darcey Bussell & Zoltan Solymosi in Black Swan pas de deux

https://youtu.be/VtEQ-BnNNl8 YouTube Swan Lake pas de deux

TIME, AGAIN

Repost from May 2015

 

The past allows for re-entry

It is never the same as the first time

Yet it remains impossible to change

Nudging open the door, entering a bygone time

We move about the silent scene

Merely unwanted apparitions

Why do we return?

Why can we not let some things fade?

Some memories are not worth saving

But they push through like

Horror corpses in cemeteries

Zombies of time demanding to be fed

Wish I could live in the now

But the now is made up of the then

And the future obscenely awaits us…

© 2015 Clarissa Simmens  (ViataMaja)

IMAGE: St. Mark’s Square, Venice, Astrological Clock

AN UNHEALTHY PREOCCUPATION WITH AGING

 

My bio teacher once pointed out

While we studied the Reproductive System

That the fetus resembled

Many of the evolutionary stages

Single cell, fish, amphibian, etc.

Known as the

“Recapitulation Theory”

It is still considered plausible

But largely discredited by

Religious fundamentalists

 

Aging is full-circle

In that we return to being

A giant infant

By the time Time does its thing to us

Loss of hair, teeth and teetering walk

In some cases talk

As in senility nonsense syllables

 

For some, we become

Frankenstein monsters

But instead of human parts

We resemble the beasts:

Turkey wattle

Bat wing arms

Camel hump

And a duck’s big butt waddle

O, can’t bear to continue

 

The Media parades Centenarians

To reassure us that we can

Keep living one more year

We see them posing in their rocking chairs

Claiming yogurt or even smoking

Is the secret to longevity

I say it’s DNA

If you want me to feel better about aging

Showing me one-hundred-year-olds

Born in 1920

Then let them be

Do-whack-a-do-ing a Charleston

Or show me Oracles of wisdom

Pontificating on how to survive stress

Unhappiness, loneliness

 

Swore I’d forget about aging

I should be grateful

Should be folking out on my ukulele

Intended to learn how to read music

How to finger pick instead of strum

But words are my lover

They come, come, come

So I mostly write, um, I mean, rant…

 

© 2016 Clarissa Simmens (ViataMaja)

IMAGE: Haeckel drawings of the Recapitulation Theory

 

 

Potential song Fragment LOL—Ukulele Waiting for Chords

STRUMMING THE UKUELE AND HERE’S ALL I COULD COME UP WITH 🙂

I’m just an alchemist

Trying to turn this

Rusty old heart

Into gold

 

Copper-colored

Blood-coated

Oxidized

Ancient

 

No magic words

Work anymore

And the chemistry

Evades me

 

I need love, baby…

 

© 2016 Clarissa Simmens (ViataMaja)

Image: Pinterest rusty heart, no identification