freedom

“TRANSIENT” IS NOT ANOTHER WORD FOR FREE SPIRIT

ONE:

I’ve been homeless
And hungry
Runaway
Merely a credit card away
From being a street person
Fortunate to have
Kind family and friends
Lucky to be
Drug and alcohol free
Favored to have volition
To retain ambition
And always remained sane
In my crazy, madcap way

TWO:

But I know
The untethered feeling
Of being alone
Unable to cope
Unable to return home
It’s like I went day tripping
To the astral plane
And suddenly the slender, silver cord
Connecting my soul to the body below
Snapped in two, severed
As I trailed the useless, dangling connection
Wanting so badly to return
But unable to do so
My mind, emotions, anger
Refused to permit it

THREE:

So I imagine
How scared the homeless may be
Like when I lived in Philly
The ones sleeping on steam grates
In twenty degree icy weather
My mom gently placing
Coats and socks
On the sleepers
While I do my part
When going to and from work
With piles of plastic sandwich bags
Filled with pennies
In the days when cash
Was the way
I would pay
And my pockets sagged from the change
One hundred pennies
Each bag
Giving to those still able to walk around
A woman wearing fake fur
Face crawling with lice
Blessed me and
I let her hug me
I don’t care what they spend it on
It’s for their comfort
Wish I could give more

FOUR:

But my heart hardened
Here in Florida
They camp in the woods
Behind my trailer
Owning bikes and designer clothes
They steal my copper pipes and
Whatever else brings money from recycling
And I feel hard
And angry
Angry with myself
For feeling cynical
About just how needy
Are these new homeless
And I think
How their living in my woods
Attracts rats
Because they shit and piss
On the loamy earth
Or toss garbage
And I say
I’m the working poor
I just want my little bit of life:
Internet, a few toys and books
And enough food and gas for the car
I never drive far
And who do they think they are????

FIVE:

So one day I’m strumming
Baritone ukulele
That sounds like a guitar
Strumming out my old folk songs
And wonder how my
Love of humanity
Wandered so far
From the days I believed
We could all live in love and peace
I feel afraid
Don’t want to leave this life
With hatred and suspicion
Enraged and spitting at others
Who are doing the best they can
To survive
What do I know of
The devastation in their lives
The people who hurt them
The cruelty of husbands and wives
Why am I judging them

SIX:

So I pull on my Wellies
Walk through the eons of fallen leaves
Find their campfire
Now deserted
I place the large plastic crate
With clothes and socks
Sleeping bags and crocks
Of baby wipes, shampoo
Soap, towels, pads
All the niceties I’m sure they don’t have
Hoping when the shelters close
As the weather warms
They will return
And forgive me my thoughts
Hope I can forgive me my thoughts, too…

 

(c) 2017 Clarissa Simmens (ViataMaja)
IMAGE: Behind my yard

 

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PASSING ALONG THE POWER

 

*scroll down for a Tom Petty video*

Entwined in DNA

Dreams refusing to die

Whether for

Fortune

Fame

Freedom

We will grow legs

And crawl out of the muck

We will align with the greenery

And face the sun

We will rev up the engine

And drive forevermore

Movement

Physical or mental

Brings us to the border

O, we must refuse to

Hover between fantasy

And the real

Because

Those who dig the deepest

Wresting the treasure chest

From the Earth’s grasp

Those who claim the prize

Will inherit the future

The priciest double helix

To pass along

Singing the sacred song

Of a life well won…

© 2017 Clarissa Simmens (ViataMaja)

IMAGE: My son B. Michael’s car

https://youtu.be/Qv4-m-cIZf4 YouTube video Running Down a Dream (Tom Petty & the Heartbreakers)

TRAJECTORY

 

Live long enough

Might find you’re in

A personal déjà vu

Full circle

Repeating events

People, places

A bit different

But it’s like

This is it

Get it right

This time

Some call it

Instant Karma

But here we are

Older

And like reprising a role

Done when young

The script remains the same

Can we make alterations?

Will we?

Sitting and staring

Like my little girl self

Children are prisoners

So are the aging

But I’m desiring the other side

Would wander in sandy boots

Climb tree canopies

Lift my wings

Through the clouded gateway

Barely brushing the leaves

But hey, deep down I know

Nothing will change

Nowhere to go

It’s me

Still me

And all the years of playing adult

Doing, dreaming

Tangential meanderings

Circumferencing

The full circle

360 degrees

Add that up

(Oh, yeah, it’s all numerology to me)

Equals 9

Tarot Hermit

Seeking the truth

For once, though

I do not mind

The vision of

Swinging a lantern

Through darkness of indecision

It is finally a relief

To be

Alone…

 

© 2017 Clarissa Simmens (ViataMaja)

IMAGE: fenced in

FREE1

 

LEARNING CURVE

 

When we run away

Because life is tough

Do we comply

With our destiny

If the past finds us

Why do we weaken

And let it drag us back

Why not continue scaling

That slippery, unpredictable hill

To the top

 

Never stop moving up

Because I’ve glimpsed the

Peak

And it is a limitless plateau

That will not let the climber

Slide

Down the other side

It allows us to

Hold steady

To have time to think

Freedom means conquering

The learning curve of life…

 

© 2016 Clarissa Simmens (ViataMaja)

IMAGE: Fraser Plateau, British Columbia, Canada